NEETaku-sensei: ” Morning class.”
Class: ” Morning NEETaku-sensei!”
NEETaku-sensei: ” Pop quiz: What year is this?”
Student: ” Umm…2017, sensei..”
That’s right. It’s friggin 2017 and I still have to deal with the ear destroying, mind numbing, teeth grindingly bad of Engrish in anime!!
Back in the 80s and 90s this sort of thing could be forgiven. Anime was still a niche hobby and many dubbing companies were either just starting out or still trying to get the hang of things. So, if something ended up being garbled upon translation, it was sort of understandable. Likewise, when subbed anime became a big thing in the early 2000s, we sort of dealt with that one character in a show that always spoke English words like they were talking out of an old transistor radio. You know, that one random, token American person that always managed to pop up in every anime from that time.
That was then, this is now. There is no excuse, in this day in age, for fans to have to deal with such nonsense! The most recent example I can think of is Mr. Red White from the Phoenix Wright anime. OH…MY…FREAKIN’ GOSH!! Never before in my life have I ever wished there was a way for people to jump into TV shows as they played. Cause if that were possible, I would strangle this guy and cut off his air supply until his eyes bulged out and he gradually passed away in my hands!!
Ok…that was a little dark, but you get the point I’m trying to make. Every moment that guy was on-screen I wanted to just bang my head against a wall until he finished talking. It was like having a drill in one ear, a drill in the other ear and they were constantly meeting in the middle! I’m so glad the games had minimal voice acting in them otherwise I probably wouldn’t have enjoyed them as much.
What compounds all of this is that I know there are Japanese voice actors that can speak fluent English. I have seen many interviews with VAs where they have shown to have a great handle on the language, even if some of their accents were heavy. Not only that, I’m sure there are some VAs that were born speaking English as their first language lurking about the country somewhere. But, none of them EVER show up in anime! Why?! What could possibly be the reason for companies not using these people? Is it that Japanese viewers are more comfortable listening to Engrish? I honestly don’t know.
I think the only other anime that had Engrish as bad as Phoenix Wright was the Prince of Tennis OAV, a show I actually love quite a bit. Words cannot describe how bad it is, so just listen to it for yourself.
If you didn’t end up in a coma after listening to all of that, congrats: You’re way stronger than me!! Instead of enjoying an awesome, over top moment in a great sports anime, all I could do was wonder how such a travesty of justice could happen…and why the black player reminded me of Zach from Dead or Alive.
You got a beef with Engrish in anime too? Let me know in the comments down below. I’m NEETaku and that was Just…My 2 Cents.